Eighth grade was hard for me. I was a late bloomer compared to some of my friends, and although my body was finally starting to change, I still didn’t feel very secure in my own skin. I was awkward, suddenly smelled like body odor, was shooting up so fast that I felt uncoordinated, and yet my body wasn’t really filling out how I’d like. Not like Jamie Johannsen and her curves. We all envied her, and I was sick of waiting for my body to catch up to hers.
So I ordered some breast enhancement herbs from the internet. I had asked my mother to buy me breast supplements, but she had said no, and explained that they were dangerous and that my body was fine just the way it was. I didn’t see why I should wait to catch up with my friends, and so asked my older sister what to do. She had had a post office box for years, which she used for people to write into her zine. She was nice about it and told me I could get my breast enhancement herbs delivered to the post box.
Well, I was all excited when the breast enhancement herbs came, encased in a flimsy cardboard box as they were. I opened the foil and a very, shall we say, the earthy smell hit my nostrils. Nonetheless, the breast enhancement herbs were guaranteed to work within sixty days, or a full refund would be given. I decided to give it a go. I held my nose and took the breast enhancement herbs.
Well, for the first week, nothing happened except that I got sick the first couple of times I swallowed those noxious breast enhancement herbs. Soon, even that stopped happening, but the growth wasn’t coming. After 65 days (I had waited for a few extra just for good measure) I realized that the results weren’t forthcoming, and sent in for my refund. They had made me order 90 pills to start with, and it had cost me over 100 dollars, money which accounted for most of my savings, and which I was anxious to get back. The return address was phony, and, to report the website, I’d have to admit to disobeying my parents. After the breast enhancement herbs failed, I just had to let nature take its course, and it eventually did – and how. Anyone know where I can get breast reduction herbs?